Category Archives: life

life with a grade schooler: that time you got your legs stuck

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We were having your math drills. You’re several chapters ahead of your programming classmates who are a couple of years older than you are; you’re excellent in multiplication, and in measuring and conversions. But for some reason, you’re still struggling with addition and subtraction. And so we were working on it; and I must add that you really are putting effort on it, which is what matters.

You were so focused that for some reason, you got your feet and lower legs inside this. Yes, both of them. And you can’t get them out.

At first you were cool with it and I thought you were just bluffing. But when you were already twisting and turning yet still can’t get your legs out of the contraption, we both got concerned. And we both panicked.

I tried to gently put you and the chair sideways thinking that might help you, but it didn’t. So I carried you (and the chair) upright again. At first I tried to instruct you how to move your feet, then I tried to gently guide your feet out, but it didn’t work. I had to will myself to not touch you because I was afraid I’d panic and pull your feet out by force which will definitely hurt you.

Trying to calm my own voice, I reminded you to calm down, take deep breaths, to clear your head. You were able to get your feet inside so that means you can take them out. Calm down, take deep breaths, and think.

Like a pro, you immediate made several Lamaze breaths. Deep breathe in, exhale out. You did six cycles. And like magic, you were able to untangle your legs. Before I could hug you, you stood up, corrected your chair, flipped your hair, and picked up your pencil to continue your drill. I counted to five (I was thinking that I should be worried if you just carry on as if nothing happened). My counting didn’t reach five. At four, you broke into tears and bawled over to me. I let you cry in my arms. At some point you looked up and with a laugh pointed to me that my shirt is full of tears and snot. I said it doesn’t matter. Just cry on. And you did. After crying your heart out, you looked up to me, eyes still full of tears, but with laughter all over your face, whilst saying, “I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life stuck in this chair!”

That definitely cracked us and gave us a good laugh. We imagined scenarios of how you could have had spent the rest of your life in that chair and how we’d have to carry you (and the chair) around to school and to after-school. And that you’ll play soccer with the chair. You added you can be the goalkeeper because you can’t run.

I am thankful that you were able to get yourself out of getting stuck. But what I was more thankful was that it gave me an opportunity to share with you how calming yourself down could help you resolve tricky situations; how going panicky will not help things; how having a clear mind could help you think of solutions to your predicament; how taking deep breaths could help you clear your mind. You asked me if deep breathing could also help you calm you down when you’re trying to make friends. And I said it could. Deep breaths couldn’t really stop all the heart pumping, but at least it could calm you down a little. I appreciate as well how you capped our predicament with laughter.

And baby, I am proud of you.

life with a grade schooler: more beautiful

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There are times when, instead of calling you by your name, or “Anak”, I call you “Beautiful”. Of course being you mother, you’re always gorgeous in my eyes. There are days though when I feel that you’re exceptionally beautiful, like this evening. So I called you again, “Hey, Beautiful”.

Your face serious, brows furrowed, and with a concerned tone, you faced me squarely. What you said next made my mouth drop.

Mommy, your much more beautiful than I am, you know. You just don’t realise it because you can’t see your own face. Well, not unless you go look at yourself in the mirror.

You then turned and looked in the mirror. I was speechless. Being your mom, I know when you’re joking or not. And I know the one you just said is really what you believed in.

I just can’t understand how though. And it’s not for the lack of looking at myself in the mirror. 😂 😂 😂

But still, thank you, Anak.

Life with a grade schooler: on purse and spectacles

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You told me how in your 生活 (livelihood) class you learned about allowances/小遣い. You’ve been wanting to have your wallet since then, as if having a wallet is a prerequisite to having an allowance. I gave you a wallet a couple of years back, but you were still too young to appreciate the value of keeping a wallet hence even after a “massive search”, it’s nowhere to be found now. (That was a Cath Kidston by the way. Since Cath in Japan has gone bankrupt in April owing to the COVID-19 pandemic, that would have made that purse very special indeed.)

But since I wanted to also get you started on managing your own money and saving, we bought you a new purse today.

To jumpstart your “money management”, I put inside your wallet a 1000 yen bill and a few coins and, later when I got it as a change, a 500-yen coin. You were so happy with the 1000yen gift you kept thanking me again and again for it, using the different Japanese words and expressions in saying thank you. I appreciate that you have a thankful heart.

So from now you’ll be managing your train fares, vending machine purchases, and snacks purchases with a 700 yen weekly allowance. I suggested ways for you to save (say, take the walk up the hill instead of using the elevator to save 52yen plus get some exercise) so that you can buy something you like. With permission from me. This prompted a sassy question:

Till when will I be asking your permission on what to buy? Till I get old?

Oh dear. That will be another day’s lesson.

And! Today, we also had your eyes checked because you’ve been squinting around for weeks now. Doctor confirmed you need some lens. Those beautiful eyes would have to be behind a frame from now.

life with a grade schooler: the pen case

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This evening, for the nth time, you cleaned your pencil case. And I got curious why you were very determined in making it clean whereas last year, there seemed to have been a competition in your class on who’s got the dirtiest pen case.

And then you dropped the bombshell. Apparently all your classmates have new pencil cases. Instead of asking me for a new one though, you cleaned your old one.

I didn’t buy you a new one in this school year because your pen case was still not broken. Just dirty. I didn’t tell you this. Baut baby, you just gave me yet another reason to be proud of you.

covid lockdown diaries: a walk in the neighbourhood

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We haven’t been anywhere other than the grocery, the schoolyard, your after-school daycare, the nearby park, for the last two months. The weather was nice, the sky ever so blue, and there weren’t people around so we decided to explore our neighbourhood and sightsee houses.

You kept on pointing which house would you like to have and kept on urging that we move out of the condo and have a stand-alone house. You said you want a garden. And I said I didn’t choose a stand alone house because I can’t take care of a garden.

Some silence. Then you said, something smells bad. I countered it’s the anti-insect bracelet that you’re wearing. Then you shouted before running off: answer is, Yui’s fart!!!!

We may be on lockdown but it has never been a boring two months.