baby diaries: Yui turns 2

Mommy remembers kissing your apple-red lips after the nurse cleaned you up, just before Mommy passed out. You cried then, Mommy melted.

Mommy remembers that night you were making effort on pulling yourself up. It was admirable to see. You fell a lot of times. But you were determined. And you didn’t give up. And indeed you succeeded about fifteen minutes after. Then just right after you’ve successfully pulled yourself up, you immediately turned your head to flash Mommy a big, happy smile. Priceless; and one that Mommy would always be grateful.

Mommy remembers you running towards Mommy, arms outstretched. And how you hugged Mommy tightly, saying “Mommy” with a deep, contented sigh whilst smiling and burrowing your face on Mommy’s chest. Mommy couldn’t ask for anything more.

Mommy and Daddy are so blessed to have you, Anak. Happy birthday baby. Grow up well.

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life with a toddler: perseverance

I have been on hiatus for some time now and it’s not because of some writer’s block or whatever you may call it. On the contrary, I have several drafts on queue (including those which I’ve promised to friends!), all waiting to be posted, but that which I couldn’t because for some reason, I could not post any photos on my mobile WordPress app – the only place I can blog these days since I could only get near our desktop once in a blue moon.

Anyways, I’m posting this now, albeit sans any photo (WordPress, any help, please?) because of the lessons learned we had today as parents.

Even from way before when Yui was just a few months old and she was learning to reach out for things, we’ve been encouraging her to persevere, to work hard and give her best effort. Now that she’s a toddler and is starting working on her own projects and toy buildings and crafts, instilling the virtue of perseverance even when faced with a tough challenge is even more important.

This evening, I read this parenting article on how to teach your child to persevere. Funny timing because just earlier this evening, our daughter taught us a lesson in perseverance.

We were doing puzzles then. After putting together and completing a few shapes, she lost interest and moved to the other end of her play room to get her Lego set – a lidded bucket with the pieces inside and a square mat. The thing was, she was also holding a towel (her security object). With the towel on one hand, she was having difficulty lifting the bucket whilst holding the mat. With only two tiny hands, of course it was difficult! So we were telling her “muri, muri” (Japanese for impossible, impossible) and we told her that she needs three hands to accomplish her feat. But the beautiful thing that unfolded was that our daughter didn’t listen to our discouraging words. She persisted. The bucket fell. She picked it up. The mat fell. She picked it up. Bucket fell again. And before she picked it up, mat also fell (yes, towel didn’t fall at all). I was already about to spring and help her. But I forced myself to stay put and watch. Thankfully Hubs stayed put as well. And so we watched how our daughter re-adjusted her hands so that she can hold all three and carry all three across the room, near Daddy and Mommy, where we could play and build towers.

It was a lessons learned for us. A reminder for us to persevere and to teach our daughter to persevere instead of saying discouraging words. Thank you for the reminder, Anak. You did (and are doing) a good job.

baby diaries: in which the baby comforts Mommy

A fellow Mom asked me last Sunday, if there are cases of other babies/kids biting Yui at daycare. My reply was that the teachers take great care to avoid such cases. And if ever there are such mishaps, they apologise extensively.

And then it happened come Monday.

When I picked Yui up at daycare, the teacher came up close to me with a grave face. And then he explained how, just after lunch time, Yui’s classmate bit Yui’s right arm. That it was very red but that they applied cold compress and medicine and that after pool time the redness was gone so that now, evening time, only a faint trace is left. I got very concerned as I’ve been seeing some pushing and kicking already even when I was there (in which in those occasions, I always scold the hitting kid).

As we walked home, I kept on asking Yui what really happened, even when I know she really couldn’t explain to me nor could I understand even if she tries I explain. In which she did try to explain, her mouth in a pout as she did so.

Come bedtime and I was stroking her back, I felt the urge to start telling her to defend herself in a non-violent way. This is very difficult considering that I need to say it in a very simple way so that my barely-two-year-old daughter could understand. In a very gentle voice, I told her to defend herself and not let others hurt her. But that she should not hurt other people as well. At every end of these three points, she nodded an agreement and a “nnnnn” (which means yes for her).

Then I told her that Mommy is worried and that I hope she would fare well in her social interactions. She then sat up, her browse furrowed as if she’s irritated about something that she remembered, all the while mumbling something. And then her face cleared as if she’s reached some resolve, her face determined and resolute. I wouldn’t have had expected to see that on the face of my barely-two-year-old daughter. But what happened next was even more incredible.

She lifted her hand to stroke my head. Then she leaned on my shoulder, put her arm around me and moved her arm up and down the way an adult would comfort someone. Amazed beyond words.

With a heart like that Anak, maybe Mommy shouldn’t worry too much; you’ll definitely do great. Yet still I pray, grow well, Anak.

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We had a talk with the daycare staff and they profusely apologised. They also assured us that they will take extra care on those babies who have biting tendencies and also assured us that Yui is not being bullied at all by a classmate and that rather she always have a classmate or two whom she’s holding hands with. Relieved.

life with a toddler: plastic bag

It’s summer and Yui’s daycare will have the pool open for two months. We were required to bring three things: swimsuit, towel (preferably with a hood – I brought Yui a bathrobe) and a plastic bag. I was really baffled with the plastic bag because I find it such a waste and not eco-friendly at all. Was about to buy a pack of plastic bag (as in the same type you’d use in grocery stores but small size) when I decided to just use the Eco bag we used as give away for our wedding since we still have a number with us. That way, I can just wash one while the other is at daycare.

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And then come first day of pool and I saw what “plastic bag” really should be. And as it happens, I was the only one who misunderstood. Hubs also thought I knew what plastic bag meant. I finally bought one today, a week after the pool started.

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Culture difference blooper.

on Japanese honesty: refunded clinic check-up fee

I was about to pay for my daughter’s checkup fee after her visit to her paediatrician the other day when the two receptionists bowed and said “申し訳ございませんでした” (Moushiwake gozaimasen deshita/we are terribly sorry for our grave error), that phrase for apology that the Japanese reserve for terrible errors/mistakes. Surprised and baffled, I waited for their explanation. It turned out that they made an error in the fee they charged us during our last visit – TWO MONTHS AGO. So now they are returning the excess amount I payed. The delta? Only ¥370, roughly equivalent to three bottled drinks.

And just in case I didn’t get their explanation right (doctor and nurses speak English but the receptionists do not), they gave me a memo so I can show it to my husband.

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Amazed. As I always say, if someone’s dependable on small things, you could count on them to be dependable on big things too.

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The clinic was not named after a person since the doctor herself is not named Yui. Rather, Yui here refers to the meaning of the kanji itself which is “bind”. The clinic aims to be a bind in connecting the community even closer.

life with a toddler: douzo, nani, yu-eee-chan!,

A sure fact: life with a toddler is never dull. All these events happened just this evening.
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We just got back home and were in the bedroom. I told Yui that we go out the bedroom already and go to the dining area so she can have her snacks (so that Mom can prepare dinner). Then I told her to open the door.

She pulled the door handle down and opened the door. And then she said, “douzo” (please go ahead) while gesturing with her hand to indicate that I go ahead.

A shocked and utterly amazed Mom walked ahead. Of course she had heaps of praise after.

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We usually ask her to throw her used tissue and papers on the trash bin. This evening, she was playing with an empty biscuit packaging that’s obviously plastic. Told her to throw it to the bin. I was thinking she’d throw it to the usual place that she places the paper trash into. Surprised when I saw her walk over to the plastics trash bin.

Now the baby already knows how to segregate the trash.
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Yui: Nani? (What’s this?)
Mom: it’s a cheetah.
Yui: nani? (Pointing at the same photo)
Mom: it’s a cheetah.
Yui: nani? (Pointing at the same photo)
Mom: it’s a cheetah

Repeat 300 times.

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She was pointing at the wet tissue dispenser.
Yui: yochan
Mom: ne, yochan (I could not clearly understand the word she’s trying to say so I just guessed “yochan” though I have no idea what it was.
Yui: yochan
Mom: ne, yochan.

Finally, in an almost exasperated and out-of-patience tone, she slowly said,
Yui: yu-eee-chan! Clean, clean, clean.

Apparently she was trying to say that she uses her wipes to clean her hands.
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This one was last weekend. She was putting her bears to sleep so she picked up a book to read to the teddies. Her choice couldn’t have been more perfect – Goodnight Moon. And nope, we don’t read this to her at bedtime since she prefers that I sing “twinkle twinkle little star” (and only that on endless repeat. She complains if I try to sing another song. I’ve sang it to her at bedtime since she was 1-month old that it had probably become a kind of “security blanket”.

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Never dull indeed!