life with a grade schooler: that time you got your legs stuck

We were having your math drills. You’re several chapters ahead of your programming classmates who are a couple of years older than you are; you’re excellent in multiplication, and in measuring and conversions. But for some reason, you’re still struggling with addition and subtraction. And so we were working on it; and I must add that you really are putting effort on it, which is what matters.

You were so focused that for some reason, you got your feet and lower legs inside this. Yes, both of them. And you can’t get them out.

At first you were cool with it and I thought you were just bluffing. But when you were already twisting and turning yet still can’t get your legs out of the contraption, we both got concerned. And we both panicked.

I tried to gently put you and the chair sideways thinking that might help you, but it didn’t. So I carried you (and the chair) upright again. At first I tried to instruct you how to move your feet, then I tried to gently guide your feet out, but it didn’t work. I had to will myself to not touch you because I was afraid I’d panic and pull your feet out by force which will definitely hurt you.

Trying to calm my own voice, I reminded you to calm down, take deep breaths, to clear your head. You were able to get your feet inside so that means you can take them out. Calm down, take deep breaths, and think.

Like a pro, you immediate made several Lamaze breaths. Deep breathe in, exhale out. You did six cycles. And like magic, you were able to untangle your legs. Before I could hug you, you stood up, corrected your chair, flipped your hair, and picked up your pencil to continue your drill. I counted to five (I was thinking that I should be worried if you just carry on as if nothing happened). My counting didn’t reach five. At four, you broke into tears and bawled over to me. I let you cry in my arms. At some point you looked up and with a laugh pointed to me that my shirt is full of tears and snot. I said it doesn’t matter. Just cry on. And you did. After crying your heart out, you looked up to me, eyes still full of tears, but with laughter all over your face, whilst saying, “I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life stuck in this chair!”

That definitely cracked us and gave us a good laugh. We imagined scenarios of how you could have had spent the rest of your life in that chair and how we’d have to carry you (and the chair) around to school and to after-school. And that you’ll play soccer with the chair. You added you can be the goalkeeper because you can’t run.

I am thankful that you were able to get yourself out of getting stuck. But what I was more thankful was that it gave me an opportunity to share with you how calming yourself down could help you resolve tricky situations; how going panicky will not help things; how having a clear mind could help you think of solutions to your predicament; how taking deep breaths could help you clear your mind. You asked me if deep breathing could also help you calm you down when you’re trying to make friends. And I said it could. Deep breaths couldn’t really stop all the heart pumping, but at least it could calm you down a little. I appreciate as well how you capped our predicament with laughter.

And baby, I am proud of you.

life with a grade schooler: planking laps

So, we have this ongoing friendly competition: planking laps. We’d each take our turn planking and time each other. You record my lapses on my phone and I record your lapses on my old phone.

Today, you made your record high of 3 minutes!! You alternated between side planks (great for your obliques!), elbow/forearm, hand, mountain climbers. Three minutes!

Determined to outdo you, I geared for my turn. But was shocked to see that record of all my previous laps have been erased!!

You tried to comfort me by hugging me and patting my back. But you hit my back so forcefully it hurt.

So I start my scratch again and today got 2 minutes 4 sec! You’re actually my senpai for planking; nevertheless I’m proud of my two minutes. 😂

life with a grade schooler: more beautiful

There are times when, instead of calling you by your name, or “Anak”, I call you “Beautiful”. Of course being you mother, you’re always gorgeous in my eyes. There are days though when I feel that you’re exceptionally beautiful, like this evening. So I called you again, “Hey, Beautiful”.

Your face serious, brows furrowed, and with a concerned tone, you faced me squarely. What you said next made my mouth drop.

Mommy, your much more beautiful than I am, you know. You just don’t realise it because you can’t see your own face. Well, not unless you go look at yourself in the mirror.

You then turned and looked in the mirror. I was speechless. Being your mom, I know when you’re joking or not. And I know the one you just said is really what you believed in.

I just can’t understand how though. And it’s not for the lack of looking at myself in the mirror. 😂 😂 😂

But still, thank you, Anak.

Life with a grade schooler: on purse and spectacles

You told me how in your 生活 (livelihood) class you learned about allowances/小遣い. You’ve been wanting to have your wallet since then, as if having a wallet is a prerequisite to having an allowance. I gave you a wallet a couple of years back, but you were still too young to appreciate the value of keeping a wallet hence even after a “massive search”, it’s nowhere to be found now. (That was a Cath Kidston by the way. Since Cath in Japan has gone bankrupt in April owing to the COVID-19 pandemic, that would have made that purse very special indeed.)

But since I wanted to also get you started on managing your own money and saving, we bought you a new purse today.

To jumpstart your “money management”, I put inside your wallet a 1000 yen bill and a few coins and, later when I got it as a change, a 500-yen coin. You were so happy with the 1000yen gift you kept thanking me again and again for it, using the different Japanese words and expressions in saying thank you. I appreciate that you have a thankful heart.

So from now you’ll be managing your train fares, vending machine purchases, and snacks purchases with a 700 yen weekly allowance. I suggested ways for you to save (say, take the walk up the hill instead of using the elevator to save 52yen plus get some exercise) so that you can buy something you like. With permission from me. This prompted a sassy question:

Till when will I be asking your permission on what to buy? Till I get old?

Oh dear. That will be another day’s lesson.

And! Today, we also had your eyes checked because you’ve been squinting around for weeks now. Doctor confirmed you need some lens. Those beautiful eyes would have to be behind a frame from now.

life with a grade schooler: the pen case

This evening, for the nth time, you cleaned your pencil case. And I got curious why you were very determined in making it clean whereas last year, there seemed to have been a competition in your class on who’s got the dirtiest pen case.

And then you dropped the bombshell. Apparently all your classmates have new pencil cases. Instead of asking me for a new one though, you cleaned your old one.

I didn’t buy you a new one in this school year because your pen case was still not broken. Just dirty. I didn’t tell you this. Baut baby, you just gave me yet another reason to be proud of you.

life with a grade schooler: homework blues

We had a row this evening. It was actually a culmination of an argument that started Saturday evening.

Saturday night. You did your homework with much gusto (no prodding from me at all). You finished all in no time. But as you looked at your reading card, you realised you forgot what needed to be read. And so you asked me to send a message to your teacher to ask her about the reading assignment. At 10pm on a Saturday. Of course I said no. Then you let go of it.

Sunday evening came and you prepared your bag for tomorrow’s class. And then panicky, you asked me to message your teacher to ask her what story needs to be read. And you asked me in a raised voice at that (on hindsight though, I think your voice was raised because you were panicking). The absurdity of the request and the raised voice pushed a wrong button in me and you definitely heard some strong scolding from me. Of course you were crying.

But after a few minutes of crying, you suddenly calmed down, said “I have a good idea”, and went to look for something. For a couple of minutes I just watched you look around for something. Intrigued, I finally asked. Unicorn memo book. You were looking for your unicorn memo book. And at almost the same instant you answered me, you found what you were looking for.

That definitely got me head scratching. Wiping a new wave of tears (you stopped crying while you were looking around), you said, “it’s not good now. But only now. So that next time I won’t forget, I’ll write it down. I’ll take notes so that I don’t forget what the homework is”.

And my jaw just dropped. I was already on the verge of getting worried how to calm you down. But what actually happened was that even as you were crying, you were already thinking of a solution on how to avoid the same problem next time. Wow baby, wow.